May 2, 2012

working mama, and worth it...

Disclosure: I do not take sides on the working mom vs. stay at home mom argument. To each their own. I, however, am a working mom. It's what I am good at and it's how I contribute and show my strengths best to my daughters. I won't criticize you -in fact I only offer my support. So I expect the same. Okay, so it has been a long time since I have posted and this is a much, much needed therapy session and I believe it will help me keep my perspective. Lots has changed since the last time I shared, that's the past and right now my family is still in a bit of a transition mode with only our third week of daycare under our belts, the (what I like to call) "daycare-germ-infectation" has well taken over and we have each had our share of the bug; mostly my poor charli-bear who looks like one of those snotty little kids I used to snark at parents for- in my pre-parenting, albeit-know it all years-lol seriously her nose will.not.stop. I can only carry so many damn tissues! okay moving on... So work is absolutely nuts! And B and I have been trying our best to come up with the best option for who has the (1) car and what days you do drop off and I do pick up, yadda yadda yadda. Any working parent knows exactly what I mean but keep in mind this is a new beast for us, the earlier referenced temp-live in dcp aka: my mom, has since moved out and about 2 hrs away so we are new to this wide world of daycare chaos. Granted it has given us (ahem, me) a valid reason to implement even more structure, a few more lists, and a master whiteboard calendar, complete with identified meal selections planned 2 weeks in advance to avoid randomized shopping trips. Seriously we don't have time for these anymore! Don't get me wrong we aren't the Von-trapps or anything and there is always room for fun (I'm a mom not a drill sargeant) and chaos still seems to seep in but this kind of structure is necessary for the Fowler baby-farm. But all of this combined with the fact that I am going to be traveling for 23 days out of the office to do data extraction(another beast I have never done before)-AND am in the mode of a whole new learning the medical model and this is absolutely terrifying for me...TERRIFYING. I usually keep CCC when it comes to work but I think my colleagues and my kiddos can sense I'm a little nervous and on edge these days. oh, and did I mention these new life changes have since forced me to start an intensive job search, yeah another time, another post, but you get the pic...oi vey. TO my point...taking into account all of the above and fast forward to yesterday am; it was my day to do drop off and me and my little ladies were heading across town (bc of course finding "affordable" trustworthy daycare has to be a 20 min drive) Charli was babbling away, Madster screeching out to connect with the town hounds, and I, consuming my copious amounts of Island Coconut coffee, without prompt the following conversation arises: Madz: Mommy are you going to work?" Me: Yes, hunny. After I drop you girls off at Ms. Lori's I'm going to work. Madz: Is Daddy at work? Me: Yep, he's working today too and then later, after you play and have your nap, Daddy will pick you up. Madz: Oh, okay. Mommy... Me: Yes. Madz: When I grow up can I be a mommy, and go to my office. Me: ABSOLUTELY! You can do be whatever you want to be and mommy is a working mommy; it's how she takes care of you. Just like Daddy works too. Madz: Okay, mommy. When I grow up I'll be a mommy with my work-office just like you do. :::::MELT:::::

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